Where did 24 years just go?

The Bradford pear trees - in bloom the week of my bday.

Tuesday was my 24th birthday.  And guess what?  I found a white hair!  (At least, I think it was...or maybe it was just really really blond - yes, I think I'll stick with that reasoning).  Either way, it was strange knowing that I've the age my grandmother was when she had three kids.  Two years older than my mother when she got married.  And at least 1/4 through my life. 

I never thought the prospect of aging would phase me.  But recently, every line I occasionally see on my face - when I'm tired or squinting - I start to think "Oh long before that is permanently visible?"  It's not so much the idea that I want to always be young and would rush to the plastic surgeon for botox, but it's the idea of unrelenting time.  The way it rushes by and you can't hold it back - not even for one single second.  The way I study my face in the mirror and think "How has it changed in the last 10 years?  How will it change in the next?" 

A b-day dinner at Kabuto with some friends.

But there are wonderful things about the idea of being older.  The older you get, the more seriously people will take you.  I've never liked being treated like a child - perhaps because I grew up surrounded by adult family members who always treated me like an equal in conversation and decisions (even if I, in fact, was not). 

There is also being happier with my skin, embracing my paleness, being thankful for my lack of freckles compared to so many of my peers.  And the older you get, the more you are aware of your body.  How your muscles react to dancing or working out.  The best pants for your body type.  The sorts of things that never cross children's minds. 

In my mind, I feel happier than I've ever been.  While I can't pinpoint the moments, I can say look back over the last six years and see how much I've grown.  My outlook on life has entirely shifted.  My mind has broadened.  The desire for wealth has taken a back seat to the desire for happiness.   I wonder if that is normal?  In many ways, it seems that as children grow up the desire for wealth is what surpasses the desire for happiness.  For me, it was the other way around. 

In high school I always assumed I'd do a job where I worked hard, did not love, but which I made a lot of money from.  Slowly, in college, I realized doing something you loved was worth so much more than money.  That perspective was validated when traveling Europe and seeing the way people lived for life, not lived for work.  I've never met so many joyful, contented people - especially in Greece, Italy and Spain.  The way they interacted with each other, placed so much value on human interactions and appreciation of life to the fullest - I came home a new woman (perhaps to the chagrin of my family whose ambitions for me have always been high). 

The "smushed banana" cake for my b-day with cousins Sydney and Camryn helping out.

But now, in my 24th year, I am doing something I love with my entire soul - I'm writing.  And, with this recent layoff, I'm traveling.  In future, I hope to combine writing and traveling - to somehow make a career out of both.